by Kai Chen | Congregational Life Director
[This blog is a reflection on the fifth week in our Lenten guide, “The Art of Presence: Practices for the Time of Lent.” This guide encourages daily habits oriented toward core, spiritual practices—in this week’s case, the art of Community. If you’d like to receive these short, weekly guides, you can sign up for the weekly email by clicking here.]
Growing up, we learn the common phrase, “Relationship is a two-way street.” In any sort of relationship, romantic or platonic, there is an unspoken expectation that both people need to contribute, communicate, and make an effort for the relationship to thrive.
In my life, I have attended several different schools, moved to a few different homes cities, and attended several different churches. In each of these new environments, the most immediate challenge is finding relationships and community. At times, I’ve experienced immediate embrace and welcome from community members, but more often than not the experience of going to new places is often marked by loneliness and sadness.
I don’t know about you, but in my mind, since I am the new person, I unconsciously expect that the people there should be the one making the effort to embrace and connect with me, not me to them; I’m here to receive friendship, not initiate it. So much for that “two-way street.”
What’s intriguing is that when we study the person of Jesus, he seldomly experienced a “two-way street relationship” with those interacting with him. But rather, Jesus was often the initiator to extend his hand of welcome towards strangers, outcasts, and even enemies.
We see many examples of this in the Bible, one being the story of Jesus and Zacchaeus (Luke 19:1-10). Zacchaeus was a wealthy chief tax collector, which meant he was unliked by many due to his tendencies to exploit. What must have made Zacchaeus feel even more lonely was the fact that he was vertically-challenged, as others looked down on him all day long, no pun intended. But when Jesus crosses paths with him, Jesus proactively greets him by name and immediately initiates a dinner in Zacchaeus’ home.
This interaction was no small matter and shattered social expectations. Jesus did not wait for Zacchaeus to initiate a conversation. Jesus did not worry about being associated with someone that was not popular. But Jesus took the first steps to extend a friendly hand, and it led to Zacchaeus’ salvation (Lk. 19:9).
We can all learn a lot from Jesus in how we interact with one another. We see examples of how we welcome new visitors in our community, and we see encouragement for new visitors to initiate the first step.
Recently, Netflix released an emotional interview with the late actor Eric Dane, who passed after battling against ALS. In this interview, he shared his final message to the world that would not be released until after he passed. In his final words to his two daughters, he says to them, “Find your people, and allow them to find you.”
Life is hard, and we naturally build up walls of protection that inevitably makes it hard for others to “find us” and know the real us. But every now and then, special people come into our lives, and when that time comes, may we allow them to find us.
Here at City Church, we hope and aim to construct our City Groups to be those exact places- space to meet others and be in community, with those that are like-minded, and with those whose differences you can learn from.
My challenge, if you’re not already actively part of some sort of community, is to take that leap of faith to visit and commit to one of our many City Groups that meets all around the city.
And my hope is that, similar to Jesus, your leap of faith to be in community would result in life-giving relationships that not only blesses you, but others as well.
This week’s practice…
Practice #5: Community
The Practice: Instituting rhythms and structures designed to make us more present with others.
The Point: Community is addition through subtraction, prioritizing relationships that give life.
The Purpose: To say “Yes” to a more life-giving community, where must I say “No” more often?
Key Verse: Ecclesiastes 4:7–16